Are you a guitar Geek?

Here at Tule Fog music we know guitar geeks (we are guitar geeks).  However, guitar geekdom is not limited to classical guitarists.  As a measure of your geek quotient, take one of the following diagnostic tests below.  If you can answer more than half of the questions correctly, you may be a guitar geek.  Treatment is likely to take many years and lots of money.

Quiz 1

1. Which band does (alleged) actor Keanu Reeves hope to take to the big time?
A. Death Star
B. Dogstar
C. Fading Star

2. In jazz guitar, what does "comping " refer to?
A. Guitar style originating in Compton California
B. Industry big wigs mooching at the working musician's expense
C. chordal accompaniment

3. Which one of these guitarists regularly performs using an open tuning?
A. Joe Satriani
B. Michael Nesmith
C. Keith Richards

4. Which folk singer has used over 50 different altered guitar tunings on her records?
A. Joan Baez
B. Joan Crawford
C. Joni Mitchell

5. Which guitarist named his last record after a graveyard?
A. Buckethead
B. Big Head Todd (and the Monsters)
C. Blind Lemon Head Jefferson

6. Which guitarist should have known better than to appear on Pat Boone's remake of "Smoke on the Water"?
A. Dweezil Zappa
B. Dimebag Darrell
C. Jose Feliciano

7. What does the term "Flying V" refer to?
A. an unusual chord voicing used by Mr. Spock
B. model of Gibson electric guitar
C. rotten vegetable used to pelt bad performers

8. In country music, what does the term "Takeoff Guitar" refer to?
A. style of guitar playing favored by United pilots in the '50s
B. lead guitar
C. what airlines insist all guitar players must do before boarding

9. Which guitarist started with Carlos Santana and went on to make millions with Journey?
A. Neil Schon
B. Neil Young
C. Neil Sedaka

10. Which metal guitarist put J. S. Bach quotes in his solos?
A. Robin Trower
B. Yngwie Malmsteen
C. Ritchie Blackmore

1. Which band is unable to tour (to support their new disc) because their lead singer is in jail?
A. Stone Temple Pilots
B. Van Halen
C. Leona Helmsley Trio

2. Which guitarist from the 60's/70's is back with a #1 hit??
A. Peter (of Peter, Paul and Mary)
B. Carlos Santana (of Carlos Santana Group)
C. Earl (of Earl Scheib's Revue and Auto Painting)

3. The term "half-stack" refers to??
A. Amplifier head and one speaker cabinet
B. What B.B. King orders at IHOP since he started his diet
C. how roadies will pack your gear if you make em' mad

4. Which guitar player never changes his strings until they break?
A. Dick Dale
B. Eric Clapton
C. Andy Griffith

5. Which musician was sued for stealing one of his own songs?
A. George Harrison
B. Tony Orlando
C. John Fogerty

6. Which composer wrote the guitar concerto, "Concierto de Arranquez"?
A. Joaquin Rodrigo
B. Issac Albeniz
C. Eric Estrada

7. Name two of Joe Satriani's students?
A. Steve Vai
B. Dave Mustaine
C. Mac Davis

8. Which acoustic guitar company uses bolt-on necks in its high priced guitars?
A. Hondo
B. Taylor
C. K-te

9. Which of the following rock players plays without a pick?
A. Mark Knopfler
B. Lindsay Buckingham
C. Kenny Wayne Shepard

10. Which classic rock album started out as a orchestral demo?
A. Days of Future Passed - Moody Blues
B. Sgt. Peppers - The Beatles
C. Meet the Monkeys - The Monkees

1. What was Nigel Tufnel's secret to great guitar sound in the movie "Spinal Tap"?
A. Clean Underwear
B. WD-40
C. His amp volume went to 11

2. Who played the guitar solo/fills on the Beatle's "While my guitar Gently Weeps"?
A. George Harrison
B. Yoko
C. Eric Clapton

3. What was Jimi Hendrix' favorite guitar and amp combo?
A. Strat and Marshall
B. Gretsch and Fender
C. Bob and Ray

4. What musical innovation did Edward Van Halen help pioneer?
A. Fired singer David Lee Roth
B. Two handed Tapping and Whammy insanity
C. Guitar modification using chain saws

5. Which Classic Rock pioneer admits to being nearly deaf?
A. Pete Townsend
B. Weird Al Yankovik
C. Ray Davies

6. On what type of guitar did Jimmy Page record the solo to "Stairway To Heaven"?
A. Strat
B. Edsel
C. Telecaster

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7. The ambient cult album "No Pussyfooting" features which musicians?
A. Fripp and Eno
B. The Pep Boys
C. Boys to Men

8. Jazz great Charlie Christian played with which other Jazz Greats?
A. Jamie Abersold
B. Charlie Parker
C. Benny Goodman

9. B. B. King's favorite guitar is named?
A. Satan
B. Alice
C. Lucille

10. Jerry Cantrell (of Alice in Chains) admits to being influenced one of the following:
A. Jack Daniels
B. Fleetwood Mac
C. Rocky and Bullwinkle

Quiz IV

1. For whom did Eric Clapton write the classic "Layla?
A. Janis Joplin
B. Patti Boyd-Harrison (married to the Beatle, George Harrison)
C. Pat Nixon (married to that impeached president)

2. Which one of the following guitarists has played with Deep purple?
A. Ritchie Blackmore
B. Steve Morse
C. Tommy Bolin

3. Which one of these guitarists regularly performs using an open tuning?
A. Joe Satriani
B. Michael Nesmith
C. Keith Richards

4. Nirvana's hit "Teen Spirit" was intended to be a rip-off of which band's sound?
A. Black Sabbath
B. Tony Orlando & Dawn
C. The Pixies

5. The term "locking trem" refers to?
A. hairstyle technique popular among Reggae artists
B. Tremolo system used to keep guitars from going out of tune
C. security system used on ski lifts

6. What year did the Beatles stop touring and performing live?
A. 1981
B. 1966
C. 1970

7. Which jazz guitarist had only two fully functioning fingers on his left hand?
A. Les Paul
B. Django Reinhardt
C. Joe Pass

8. Marshall, Vox and Fender are famous for their ?
A. Attitude
B. 1957 hit, "Surfin Santa"
C. fine amplifiers

9. Classical guitars normally have how many frets?
A. as many as they like
B. 22
C. 19

10. What company did Leo Fender start after he sold Fender Inc. to CBS?:
A. Budweiser
B. K-Tel
C. Music Man

1. Which guitarist is responsible for the rockin' sounds on early Elvis records?
A. Cliff Gallup
B. Scotty Moore
C. Benjamin Moore

2. Which guitarist was kicked out of Metallica in the early days?
A. Ritchie Blackmore
B. Neil Young
C. Dave Mustaine

3. Which guitarist was famous before his 20th birthday?
A. Eric Clapton
B. Kenny Wayne Sheperd
C. Johnny Lang

4. Which jazz guitarist had to re-learn to play the guitar after brain surgery ?
A. Pat Martino
B. Howard Roberts
C. Andy Griffith

5. Name the guitarist that guested & dish he made on the local cable show Monterey's Cookin?
A. Sammy Hagar/Tequila cocktails
B. Kirk Hammet/UnForgiven Casserole
C. Frank Zappa/Burnt Weenie Sandwich

6. Who was known as the "fifth Beatle"?
A. Mr. Natural
B. Dick Clark
C. George Martin

7. "Strangling the Chicken" refers to what guitar technique?
A. An unusual lunch preparation technique from the 1920's
B. What Metal guitarists would like to do to agents who book them Holiday Inn gigs
C. over the top string bends

8. Who was a drummer in a famous band before playing guitar in another popular band?
A. Adrian Belew
B. Dave Grohl
C. Charro

9. Segovia was known to have played which of the following luthier's instruments?
A. Herman Hauser
B. Jose Ramierez
C. Herman Munster

10. Pink Floyd's "Dark Side of the Moon " is the secret soundtrack to which film?
A. Star Wars
B. Porkies III
C. The Wizard of Oz

Quiz VI

1. Amount one should tip lounge band after requesting "Feelings"?
A. $5.00
B. $500.00
C. They should be paying you for the privilege of playing this classic.

2. Number of times it takes Billie Joe to get the intro right on Green Day's "Good Riddance"?
A. It's still not right
B. 3
C. 1

3. What is on tracks 1-12 on Korn's CD "Follow the Leader"?
A. Gregorian Chant
B. Carlton Sheet's latest real estate money making plan
C. blank space

4. Classic rock hit that was written during a live show after the guitarist broke his 6th string?
A. American Woman
B. I'd Love to Change this String . . . er ah . . the world
C. The Sound of Silence

5. Deep Purple's "Smoke on the Water" was inspired by to which of the following?
A. the Hudson river catching fire and burning in the 70s
B. A fire at a Frank Zappa concert in a Swiss casino
C. An obscure statute governing the conduct of cruise ship captains

6. Which guitarist regularly played a double neck guitar in concerts?
A. Jimmy Page
B. Steve Vai
C. John McLaughlin

7. What does the term "rest stroke" refer to?
A. a specific right hand technique used in classical guitar
B. a medical condition plaguing vacationing guitarists
C. a swimming style favored by B. B. King

8. Which rock icon will be bidding for one of his own guitars inadvertently put up for auction?
A. Eric Clapton
B. Al Borland
C. Tommy Smothers

9. Which was the last Beatles album recorded?
A. Abbey Road
B. Let it Be
C. The White Album

10. Which artist/band features seven string guitars tuned down low?
A. Limp Bizkit
B. Korn
C. Ricky Martin

1. Which guitarist lost his left hand fingertips in an industrial accident and has played his entire career on fake fingertips?
A. Nigel Tufnel (Spinal Tap)
B. Tommi Iommi (Black Sabbath)
C. Norman Bates (Psycho)

2. Whom did Segovia quit teaching after discovering this person also played electric guitar?
A. George Harrison
B. Chet Atkins
C. Julian Bream

3. Which guitar player co-wrote and guested on Cream's song "Badge"?
A. Carlos Santana
B. David Cassidy
C. George Harrison

4. Which guitarist played the electric guitar parts and appeared in the movie "Crossroads"?
A. Steve Vai
B. John Mayall
C. Leonard Nimoy

5. Which classical guitar player regularly performs Hendrix and Prince tunes?
A. Benjamin Verderey
B. Burl Ives
C. Andres Segovia

6. Les Paul is known for which of the following?
A. Invention of multi-track recording
B. Innovations in solid body guitar design
C. A string of hits with Mary Ford in the 1950s

7. Which of the following guitar players didn't play in Frank Zappa's band?
A. Steve Vai
B. Adrian Belew
C. Tommy Tedesco

8. Which one of the following guitar players did not play with Miles Davis?
A. John McLaughlin
B. Robben Ford
C. John Ambercrombie

9. In order to perform a "Dive Bomb" correctly you will need which of the following?
A. A parachute and a very long guitar cord
B. A wang bar and an attitude
C. a pool and some cherry bombs

10. Which bass player claims to have recorded a part nude (in the studio) to get the right attitude?:
A. Flea
B. Les Claypool
C. Bill Wyman

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© 2000 by Guy Cantwell